My mobile phone went, ‘Plong,’ and confirmed: the location was sent. I put my phone back in my pocket and quickly caught up with the group. On Wednesday morning, our guide, Eliott from France, was leading us through the ecologically special ‘Sand Forest’ when we came across a swarm of bees in the forest, along with two giraffes and a zebra, which was looking for a new home. I remembered Graham’s bee project and that he was always looking for wild native bees. ‘The wild bees are much better adapted to their respective environments,’ he had explained at the time. So I sent Graham the location of the bees. ‘He will be very happy.’
‘We are often afraid of things we don’t know. But fear disappears when we get to know things and understand them. So, deal with the things that scare you.’ [Olga Heibel]
Apart from this piece of wisdom from Olga, the rest of Wednesday morning was unspectacular. Olga taught us about ‘taxonomy’ and we were given the task, again in group work, of creating the first ‘species profiles’. One digital, one on paper and one as a video. How fitting that we had Jona as a filmer and me as an ‘artist’ in the group. While Jona dedicated himself to the Curry Bush and Joss to the ‘Buffalo Thorn’, I sat down to draw the rhinoceros, inspired by Graham’s story. I hadn’t really drawn in a long time, but I had been planning to do more of it for a long time. This was a great opportunity.
From 5:30 p.m. onwards, things got more exciting because a ‘high-ranking’ visitor had registered to come to the camp: Sarah Ferguson. To be honest, I first had to Google to find out who she actually is. But then I was no less impressed:
Sarah Ferguson is a former professional South African sportswoman, extreme endurance swimmer and the first person to swim the 63 kilometres around the Easter Islands – to draw attention to the plastic pollution of the world’s oceans. Find out more here.
A strong person with a strong story. Sarah was now here at the camp because she wanted to start another swimming expedition from Sodwana Bay on Thursday morning: four days, fifty kilometres in the open sea. It was clear to me: I definitely had to get in touch with Sarah and try to persuade her to do an interview about strength!
After we had all eaten Spagetti Bolognese together in the large community hall, the Bhjane students gathered in front of the television to watch Sarah’s documentary ‘Against the Current’ about her project. Meanwhile, Sarah and her team began preparing their boat, which was parked in front of the building, for the next day.
I had actually planned to watch the documentary too. But since the internet connection was so poor that the film kept stuttering, I got up at some point and went outside to watch the team prepare and maybe get a good opportunity to talk to them.
Outside, it was still a pleasant 23 degrees and as I strolled around the buildings, I came across a scene that I found strong and inspiring:
It was dark. The small blue speedboat was illuminated by the headlights of a pickup truck, on a trailer directly in front of the building, while Sarah and her team were busy hoisting all sorts of things from and onto the boat, opening and closing car doors and communicating with each other by shouting loudly. Nothing special about that, at first glance.
But I could feel the ‘adventure energy’, the mood of departure. Since this did not seem to me to be the right situation to start a conversation, I just leaned against a tree a few metres away, felt the mood and was part of it to some extent. But the longer I stood there, the more a longing arose in me: I would very much like to be there now! Not in the swim. But in an event like this. Being on the cusp of something like this is great! I want that too – it burned brightly and clearly in my heart.
After everything was packed, the team and Sarah gathered in the social room and a small, informal roundtable discussion began. In particular, the students of the marine course had many questions, some of which were really exciting, and Sarah and her team were remarkably open-minded and patient. This was remarkable because she had a big task ahead of her the next day and it would have been understandable if she hadn’t felt like doing a roundtable discussion. But she was. The rest of her team was also open-minded and very interesting. Since the waters of South Africa were inhabited by sharks, she had taken Jess Escobar-Porras with her as a ‘shark spotter’. She was a scientist specialising in sharks. There was a ‘back-up’ kayaker, Andy Coetzee, who accompanied Sarah the whole time in the kayak, the skipper Emil Pirzenthal and the biologist Natalie dos Santos, who specialised in turtles. Not so important in this case, but she provided the boat and was there as a ‘girl Friday’ and second skipper.
At the end, Andy, a slim, tanned man in his late fifties, gave an inspiring speech to the students of the marine course, starting with the question of where they thought they would get a job later on?
‘The possibilities for marine guiding are very, very limited,’ he said, and went on to explain, “You have to create your own job. Build something. Don’t rely on getting a job. That’s not going to happen in this sector. Start up your own business. Look at shark diving. It didn’t even exist a few years ago. Now it’s a whole industry in South Africa. Find your niche and do it yourself.”
‘Very strong,’ I thought. It was a strong speech, not only for the naval students. Many South Africans already had a different attitude towards work than the Germans. Due to a lack of opportunities in South Africa, the option of building something yourself was much more present than in Europe. Many of the young students here had already told me that they wanted to start their own company in the long term and then offer their own tours.
Unfortunately, I didn’t get to hear as many of the other questions and answers as I would have liked. Many of the people asking questions spoke very quietly, but the background noise was very loud and my English had improved, but was still not good enough for such a situation. It was a bad combination.
It was getting later and later and I realised that it was about time to ask Sarah for the interview.
Then I noticed something strange: in the afternoon, I was still full of energy and it was completely clear to me that I would ask her for an interview. But now, here in her presence, I suddenly felt a growing resistance inside me, I even felt inhibited. This was mainly due to the lack of opportunity for a ‘personal’ encounter in a small setting. Sarah was sitting on a bar stool at the edge, but the attention of everyone focused on her had created a kind of ‘stage situation’. If I wanted to address her now, I would also have to enter this ‘stage’ and would also have the attention of everyone else. I actually have no problem going public and speaking in front of many others and asserting myself. I have done this many times. But now I suddenly felt inhibited to open up my concerns and my story in front of everyone, because this time it was different. This was uncharted territory and I had not yet found my role as an interviewer. I lacked the experiences, the lived experiences. I actually lacked self-confidence in this area. Asking for an interview with someone so interesting to me was definitely outside my comfort zone and I didn’t want to share this with EVERYONE here in the camp.
Suddenly she got up and said goodbye warmly.
‘Now or never…‘ I said to myself. She opened the door right next to her –
’…quickly!”
– she left the room –
‘…go!’
I stood up from my seat at the other end of the room and followed her, while everyone else remained seated and looked after her, and then after me. As I stepped out of the doorframe, I just barely heard the engines being started and then the cars roared down the red sand road. ‘That was quick!’ I said to myself, a little taken aback. I had somehow expected the group to linger at the cars a little longer.
Now I stood in the dark in front of the building in the middle of the sandy road and watched the lights of the convoy go by, saw the red rear lights and the white cones of light illuminating the red earth getting smaller and smaller as they turned a curve and disappeared behind the trees.
Mission failed!
Suddenly, I felt like in a computer game from my youth, when I had failed an important mission because I had been too slow.
‘MISSION FAILED’ appeared before my mind’s eye and, together with a very specific sound, settled into the scene.
FUCK! I was annoyed. I was annoyed with myself and one thing suddenly became very clear to me: I still didn’t fully believe in my interview and the questions. I was not yet one hundred per cent convinced of it myself and therefore still so unsure that I let myself be influenced and deterred by the mere presence of others. So I was still afraid. I remembered Olga’s words from that morning, and even though she may have meant them differently, they suited my situation perfectly:
I was afraid because this situation, this interview, was unknown to me. I had never conducted an interview with these questions on the topic of ‘strength’ with a truly relevant person. Neither in German nor in English.
There was only one way to overcome this fear: I had to face it and do it. I had to do this interview!
Find out more about Sarah’s organisation Breathe Conservation here.
Recommended book: Swimming easter island:
